Is Death God's Will?
While certain members of our community may serve as 'bereavement ministers', it is important to realize that we are all
bereavement ministers, since we all have contacts with those who grieve.
It is equally important that we are aware of certain pitfalls involved in ministering to those in grief. There are
many sayings that are customary in our response to grief and death, however, some of these can be quite detrimental.
Ministering to those in grief is primarily an act of listening. Knowing what to say to a person in grief is difficult.
We need to be led by charity and the Holy Spirit. However, it is equally important to know what not to say. In this
article, and ones to follow, we will be discussing several pitfalls and try to put them into a pastoral and theological
context.
Woman in Grief
Artist: D W Kellogg1
Woman in Grief
Artist: Shillan Jabbar2
One common saying is:
“His death was God’s will”.
While it may be stated in charity and sympathy, we need to consider what is heard in the hearts of those who grieve.
There are several aspects that need to be considered to understand why such a statement is detrimental.
First, there’s the theological aspect: Is a person’s death God’s will? Is God’s will always done?
To address the second question first, God’s will is always done. However we need to understand God’s Will. It is
God’s will that mankind is free, free to make both good and bad decisions. God’s will is done in that we are free and
God does not violate our freedom. However, we do not always exercise our freedom in God’s will. If we did, then man
would never have sinned and praying that God’s will is done (Lord’s Prayer) would be unnecessary. So, in an individual
sense God’s will is not always done.
This differentiation helps us to understand the first question: Is death God’s will? In the Genesis account of
Creation, God made man, the earth, and all it contains. He looked upon what He had done and pronounced it “Good”.
If we examine God’s creation, we see that death was not a part of God’s plan. Satan, through temptation and man’s
response, brought death into the world and, thus, death is an integral part of our existence.
Is death God’s will? There is a Rabbinic Tale which tells of the destruction of the Egyptians in the Red Sea.
When the Egyptians were drowned, so the tale runs, the angels began a paean (expression) of praise, but God said
sorrowfully; “The work of my hands are sunk in the sea, and you would sing before me”? The love of God is such that
he can never take pleasure in the destruction of any of the creatures whom His hands have made.
God does not will the death of anyone. Some may object saying, wasn't Jesus' death on the Cross God's Will?
Will is the expression of intent. God's intent, as thus His Will, was that mankind could be saved, and Jesus' death
on the Cross was the only way that could be accomplished. God certainly took no pleasure in the death of His Son,
nor does He will the death of His creatures.
Second, there are pastoral consequences in saying a person’s death was God’s will. In the midst of grief such a
statement paints God as vengeful, the one who took my husband, wife, son, or daughter away. There are many grieving
people, through their own misunderstanding, who are angry with God, and such statements only aggravate their grief.
Hearing that God is responsible for their suffering and loss increases that anger and makes God an enemy. What could
be a greater loss than to lose a son or daughter, a husband or wife, and in the process lose God! At a time when we
most need God, saying that our loved ones’ death is God’s will is insensitive at best, and at
worst…